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How to Carry Bigfoot Home

My audiobook narration for Chris Tarry’s award-winning short story collection HOW TO CARRY BIGFOOT HOME is available.

It is a collection of beautiful, funny, bittersweet, and (in the case of one of them) Pushcart-nominated tales for adults.  It was a fantastically fun project to work on.

Please be so kind as to check it out on Amazon.com, Audible.com and (coming soon) to iTunes.

#Bigfoot #audiobook #redhenpress

Actual Conversations Heard at My House #87

(Setting:  My house, as the wife spots the now semi-empty steel can we’ve been using to collect bacon grease.)
THE WIFE–  What happened to all the bacon grease?
 
ME– I threw it away in the trash.
 
THE WIFE– Why didn’t you just throw away the whole can?
 
ME– So I could reuse the can for more bacon grease. And so I wouldn’t have to throw away a can.
 
(Long pause)
 
THE WIFE– You are officially the Recycling Nazi.
 
ME– I prefer “Recycling Fascist.”
 
THE WIFE– (Coming over to tickle me) More like “Recycling Fat-scist.”
 
(Pass the bacon, y’all.)

Sightings and Appearances

Eric is making signing and speaking appearances to promote A Consternation of Monsters. (He also occasionally does some acting.) You’ll find those appearances and roles here.

February 7-9, 2019 — Eric’s short play “Aye Do” will be featured as part of Greenbrier Valley Theatre‘s GVT Play Fest.  The decision to settle down can be tough for some, but when you’re a hardened Pirate Captain living a rich life of high-seas adventure filled with “ya harrs” and “yo hos” and pillaging yachts of Wells Fargo executives, it can be downright vexing.  Until one destiny-altering, magical moonlit walk on a beach sets the wedding bells a-ringin’.  But will his first mate get him to the church on time or talk him out of a journey fraught with perils and potential doom?  Johnny Depp, beware!  A 10 minute sea-faring romantic comedy about growing up.  And pirates.

Actual Conversations Heard at My House #459

(Setting: our living room, as the end credits roll on our six-month-old DVRed copy of JUSTICE LEAGUE, a movie which I have only now finally got around to watching and which my wife has only now finally got around to reading a book during, punctuated by long stretches of looking over the edge of her iPad to stare at Jason Mamoa as Aquaman, a little drool running out of the edge of her mouth.)

ME—  Huh.  Well, as not great as that movie was, it was not nearly as bad as I expected it to be.

THE WIFE— (grinning) Isn’t there a movie with just Aquaman in it?

ME—Yes.  It’s called “Aquaman.”  And it is in theaters now.

THE WIFE— (Giggles)  I would go see that.  (Sly grin.)  Maybe they’ll have more scenes of him drinking and stomping around.

ME—(Stunned)  You liked that, huh?

THE WIFE—(Beaming) Uh huh!

ME—You are a puzzle I will never solve.  When I drink and stomp around you say I’m an alcoholic.

THE WIFE—Yeah, but I have to live with you.

(Cut to the following evening, as we emerge from the local cinemaplex having viewed all 2 hours and 22 minutes of Aquaman.)

THE WIFE— That was a terrible movie

ME— Indeed.

THE WIFE— But Jason Mamoa was pretty.

ME— He was prettier than Amber Heard and her clown wig.

 

Rabbits Now Firmly in the Wreckage!

My latest audiobook narration has been released.  It is the audio reading of the latest in S.D. Smith’s Tales of Old Natalia series, The Wreck and Rise of Whitson Mariner, read by yours truly.   It is a continuation of the adventures begun in The Blackstar of Kingston (which you definitely should hear first).  In fact, this book finally puts some wonderful off-screen characters from Blackstar on screen at last.

It is a very worthy sequel and definitely advances the community of rabbits toward the kingdom we know it will become in The Green Ember (as read by the fantastic Joel Clarkson).  They just have to survive, first.  And no one’s safety is guaranteed.

Check it out now at Amazon, Audible.  Or, save $1 and order it from the publisher’s website.

Even more Impending Wreckage…

The recording and mastering has been completed on the audiobook adaptation of the latest in S.D. Smith’s Tales of Old Natalia series, The Wreck and Rise of Whitson Mariner, read by yours truly.   It was a pleasure to revisit characters from The Blackstar of Kingston (which you definitely should hear first), as well as give voice to new characters in the series and wonderful characters who only existed off-stage in the first book.  (Mother Saramack, anyone?)

It is a worthy sequel and definitely advances the community of rabbits toward the kingdom we know it will become in The Green Ember (as read by the fantastic Joel Clarkson).  They just have to survive, first.  And no one’s safety is guaranteed.

Expect publication in early December.

The Wreck has begun…

Recording has officially begun on the next audiobook for which I am serving as narrator: The Wreck and Rise of Whitson Mariner by S.D. Smith. It is the second book in Smith’s Tales of Old Natalia series, which are set a century before his regular Green Ember series and detail how that kingdom began.

I can report that it is a worthy sequel to The Black Star of Kingston and it’s good to be voicing old friends (and enemies) once again.  If you’ve not read (or better yet, heard) The Black Star of Kingston, you should do so before journeying up river for the next one.  Otherwise all the twists and turns won’t be nearly as satisfying.

Look for it (listen) in early December.

Sightings and Appearances

Eric is making signing and speaking appearances to promote A Consternation of Monsters. (He also occasionally does some acting.) You’ll find those appearances and roles here.

November 10, 2018 — Eric will be leading a writing workshop called the Joe McCabe Memorial Short Play Writing Workshop as part of the Fall Writing Conference for West Virginia Writers, Inc.  The first workshop Eric ever attended at a WV Writers Conference was one on the craft of writing short plays taught by the late and prolific playwright Joe McCabe. In this workshop, Eric will honor Joe’s legacy by using examples of Joe’s work (as well as Eric’s own short plays) as a backdrop to discuss the form. The goal is for participants to leave with ideas for short plays of their own to develop as well as resources for submitting those plays to theatres around the country who are actively seeking them.

Sasquatch Carting Lessons Now Available

Ladies and Gentlemen, I’m pleased to announce that my latest audiobook narration, the award-winning short story collection HOW TO CARRY BIGFOOT HOME by writer/musician Chris Tarry, is now available.

It is a collection of beautiful, funny, bittersweet, and (in the case of one of them) Pushcart-nominated tales. It was a fantastically fun project to work on.

Please be so kind as to check it out on Amazon.com, Audible.com and (coming soon) to iTunes.

#Bigfoot #audiobook #redhenpress

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